The Night Before

So, I'm scheduled to preach tomorrow and I'm terrified. Okay, terrified may be a bit too strong because I'm finding time to blog about it. Let's call it concerned instead. When I preach I usually leave a lot to my imagination in the moment. I don't prepare a manuscript because my speaking voice is so much stronger than my writing voice. I do usually script my transitions and I always script my closing. One of my pet peeves is a preacher who can't end their damn sermon. I joke that the hardest words for a preacher to say are, "Let us stand and sing." I'm about as prepared as I ever am. Maybe a little less than usual.

My concern is not over what I haven't done but rather over my inability to grasp the implications of the sermon. I'm preaching from Revelation 1:4-20 and talking about Jesus as the King. It is Christ the King Sunday. The day when the old calendar year comes to a conclusion and we launch ourselves into the mystery of Advent. I grew up in a tradition that didn't really embrace the Christian calendar too much. We celebrated Easter and Christmas (usually) but we didn't pay much attention to the rest of the year. Furthermore we never really talked much about the Kingdom of Heaven except to point out that it was the church and that to be a part of the kingdom you must be baptized. As an adult. My canon was Acts and Paul so concepts found in other placed were not really emphasized.

I find myself returning to Jesus' paraballic metaphors. The kingdom of heaven is like:
. . . a mustard seed, a weed, planted in a garden.
. . . a careless sower flinging seed everywhere.
. . . a treasure hidden in a field which a man will sell all that he has to possess.
. . . a merchant in search of pearls willing to sell all that he possess to procure the pearl he has been searching for all his life.

Even these are more question than answer. The kingdom of heaven is LIKE this. These are close approximations. The kingdom of heaven is more question than answer. Maybe this is why Jesus tells those who'll listen to seek first the kingdom and trust God on everything else.  Active pursuit of the kingdom rather than passive waiting for it to drop into our lap. The vision of Jesus in Revelation 1 is of a powerful, active being at work in and for his church. He's not standing still, and he calls us to follow him.

I have always wanted things in my life to be easy. I have expected that as I get older I'll get better at life and it will come easier to me. What I've learned is that things that are easy are cheap and without real value. Things that are worth having require effort and blood and sweat and tears. Jesus wants to welcome us into the reign of God. Seek and you will find he says. Knock and the door will be opened. Ask and it will be given.